Why You Shouldn’t Rush Your Healing Journey

Trying to rush the healing process is like driving a car without a license. You know that you will eventually get caught but you continue anyway. As you increase your speed, the risk does too and before you know it BOOM.

You’ve crashed. You’ve been caught.

Caught out by the pain and emotion you have spent years running from.

Throughout my healing journey, I have begun to notice old familiar patterns arise. On reflection, this pattern has repeated itself for the past 10 years, if not more.

Despite loving my own company, I have never been good at being alone. I have never been 100% single. If I was not in a relationship, I was always chatting to a potential partner or going out with the sole focus of meeting a guy.

Turning to men has always been escape for me and the outlet where I have sourced my identity, my worth. I have used men as a scapegoat from what I truly desire.  And from my authentic self.

To most peoples’ surprise, I am very free spirited at heart and my soul craves the unknown. But, my ego and mind chase stability and routine. They crave the mundane, yearn for security and live for a lack of adventure. All of which bring out my non-self attributes and lead me further away from who I am.

A lesson can never be learnt until we acknowledge it’s message. They repeat themselves as patterns, over and over until we finally realise what the Universe is trying to communicate. I am beginning to dig deeper to discover what lies beneath these patterns and rewrite my future.

By being fully alone, it is only then that I can live my true self and rewrite those ingrained patterns. No man can heal my broken heart, only I can. Just like loving myself and feeling whole – that comes from within me.

If you are feeling the same way, accept the vulnerability and turn your focus inward. It may cause discomfort or worse you could be faced with repressed emotions. Just like the light that is within you, that pain needs to surface to fully heal. Take comfort in knowing that within that pain you will eventually find peace.

It is only when we pass through a storm can we find the rainbow.

You are the rainbow. 

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Flowing Through The Resistance

For the past few days I have been met with resistance.

Resistance to being in the present, to letting go.

Resistance toward my future.

When we are at an unknown crossroad in our lives, we may find that old familiar patterns arise.

I have found myself scrolling endlessly on social media to distract myself from pain.

I have had the urge to seek validation from men.

I have turned to alcohol.

I have found safety in food, or lack of it.

But none of those outlets bring me any joy.

They all are resisting the now.

These are all products of past conditioning that I need to decondition myself from.

Nothing I find on social media can set me free.

No man can give me the validation I need to feel beautiful, to feel worthy, to feel whole.

I will not find solace in the bottom of a bottle or in the first sip of a drink.

Eating my way through the darkness will only fill me with disgust, not joy. 

All of these methods are ways in which I have coped in the past.

I have laid plaster upon plaster over my wounds with these so called antidotes.

I have the power to go deeper than these artificial retreats. 

I can tell myself I am strong, worthy and beautiful.

I can switch off from social media to minimise my anxiety.

I can say no to the drink that will make my mind quieten for only a matter of minutes.

I can fuel my body with wholesome foods that nourish not hinder. 

It is only I who can heal and create a new path to navigate through this pain.

It is only I who can craft new coping mechanisms that push through the resistance and bring me into the present.

It is only I who can look inward to find the answers as clear as day.

It is only I.

5 Ways I Tune Into My Soul’s Purpose

Here are 5 ways I tune into my soul’s purpose. Many of these may or may not work for you, but they are worth trying. By incorporating these into my daily routine, I feel more connected than ever before. When we are living in line with our soul’s purpose, everything begins to fall into place.

Meditation

Meditation is the perfect way in which I tune into my soul purpose. When my mind quietens, I am not only more connected but at peace. Meditation can take many forms, it doesn’t have to be sitting on the floor for hours on end. For me, taking 5 minutes at the end of a yoga sequence or before I set my daily intentions is enough to connect. When it is forced, that is where you will meet resistance. Finding a practice that works for you and sticking with it is the key. When your thoughts subside, you can only then connect within and receive the messages you need. Allow yourself to be guided by your inner guru and your intuition.

Yoga

I have dipped in and out of yoga for most of my adult life. As a highly inflexible being, I found yoga classes a hinderance rather than a release. Instead, I have incorporated my own yoga practice into my daily routine that works for my body. I allow the movement to flow with my breath and therefore connect deep within. The fluid movement allows my mind, body and soul to come together as one and tap into my purpose. When you tune in through yoga, you will be amazed at what ideas and messages come to you.

Being With Nature

Spending time outdoors surrounded by nature is perfect for reconnecting. If you are ever feeling lost, need time to reflect or ground yourself – being outdoors holds the answer. I have incorporated two peaceful walks into my day to day routine and I couldn’t feel more at peace. Whether you choose to mindfully walk or sit amongst the trees and just be, nature is the most powerful way to connect.

Reading The Power Of Now

The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment by Eckhart Tolle has been the book that has changed my life. It has reminded me that being present is all there is. If we feel anxious or stressed, we are projecting ourselves into the future. If we find ourselves feeling guilty, bitter or resentful, we are stuck in the past. Being in the now is our only salvation. Without presence, we spend too much time in our heads and not enough time simply being. Once you access the power of the present moment, you will be able to connect wholeheartedly to your purpose.

Being Lost In Flow

Find that ‘thing’ that allows you to become lost in the flow. That outlet that lights you up, makes you lose track of time and create from a place of non-self. Have you ever created something that you look at upon completion and question ‘did I really create that?’ There are times where I have written so passionately from the heart that I can’t quite believe the words that have flowed through me. When we are in the flow and connecting to a higher source, our best work comes through. Allow your purpose to light you up on a daily basis and watch as your vibrations elevate.

How do you connect to your soul purpose?

The Journey To Self Isn’t Easy

Nobody said the journey to self would be easy. But I didn’t believe it would be so hard. 

It is at this point of my life where I feel the most vulnerable.

My very existence feels malleable.

I watch as it gets pulled in multiple directions by the influence of others, by opinion, fact, circumstance and fear.

It manifests itself as deep rooted anxiety, eating away at my stomach and spilling over into parts of me it should never have found.

It leaves an empty void that is hollow and dark.

Yet, I spend my day filling up that hole with light.

Sourced from meditation.

Yoga.

Reading.

Writing.

As the light pours in I can feel the anxiety softening.

My thoughts begin to quieten.

The essence of being coarses through my veins and I feel alive once more.

In those moments, I no longer find myself in that hollow space alone.

I find a ladder.

This ladder has many steps and I am taking my time to climb.

If I rush I may fall.

But with focus, determination and trust, I can make it to the top. 

It is only I who can defy others from having control over my feelings.

It is only I who can switch off the noise.

It is only I who can let my wounds bleed and watch them seep into the deepest fragments of my existence.

It is only who I can allow those wounds to heal. 

No plaster or quick fix can make this journey any easier. 

It is all part of the process.

To uncover, discover and recover.

Why You Should Listen To Your Intuition & How

Think back to a time when you have had a bad gut feeling about something. It could be in regards to a person, a situation or a place. Sometimes we choose to listen, other times we ignore. But I can guarantee that you will reflect on that feeling and be glad that you had it.

When travelling I could sense danger about situations and people almost instantly. My intuition became my only guide as I found myself in scenarios that even my mind couldn’t comprehend. From near dodgy hostel stays, dangerous motorcycle rides or disingenuous friendships, I tuned in wholeheartedly. I only had myself to rely on in those situations and thankfully I am here to tell the story today.

But what about listening to your gut when you are not alone? What about in relationships? We have all known a time when somebody hasn’t been right for us, be it a partner or a friend. Sometimes we get addicted to the pain of being treated badly or get comfortable and complacent. We try and make friendships work even when that person doesn’t align with our values or have our best interests at heart. All along that niggling gut feeling is usually present throughout but its amplitude may vary.

“Intuition is seeing with the soul.” 
― Dean Koontz ―

Sometimes we don’t want to tune in. We want to prove our intuition wrong and laugh in the face of its mistake. We think that through distraction and burial it will go away. But until it is addressed, it never will.

If I didn’t address the gut feeling I had about my old lifestyle, I wouldn’t be writing this today. I wouldn’t have rediscovered my love for life, for self-development or for growth. I would have remained stagnant and simply existed for no other fault than that of my own. By walking away from a life that I had built and the future I had began to plan, I would never have flourished. I cracked to let the light seep in and heal my open wounds. It has brought me back to myself and I feel whole again.

If your intuition is trying to tell you something, listen. You can tune in more easily than you think. Take a moment or two to simply breathe, become the watcher of your thoughts and just be. It is only when we look inwards that we can find our truth.

How often do you listen to your intuition?

Starting Over: A New Beginning

I have always been a control freak. I am highly organised, always on time and make plans weeks or months in advance. I am somebody who loves structure but despises its boundaries too. I need stability but also hate the lack of spontaneity and variety it brings. It has been a conflicting battle of mine that I have been fighting for as long as I remember. And I am so sure I am not the only one.

It’s funny how all I craved was stability, but now I have none. I have no job, no home of my own and no clear direction or plan of where I am heading. As much as it fills me with fear, it also fills me with hope.

No longer do I, or you for they matter if you’re in the same position, have an excuse. All too often we use work, chores, commitments and relationships as an excuse of not to do something. I can hear myself saying how I didn’t pursue particular passion projects simply because I didn’t have the time in my schedule. Yet, I found the time to aimlessly scroll on social media or watch TV yet could never commit to working towards something enriching. It is funny how only when our life is stripped back to the basics can we start again.

I am taking the next phase of my life, however long It may last, as the space for self discovery and bringing those passion projects to life. It is a time to play, make mistakes, embrace the unknown and truly thrive. When you have nobody to answer to other than yourself, you begin to unlock parts of you that you never knew existed.

My point is, if you find yourself feeling lost in this new scenario, trust that it will work out. I truly believe they not only does everything happen for a reason, but the Universe has our back. When we begin to put time and effort into self growth and looking within, it is then that real change will happen.

“Open your eyes, look within. Are you satisfied with the life you’re living?” 
— Bob Marley —